(Health.com) From a romantic to a player, experts say there are six different ways you can be “in love.” Love can look very different. Some couples fawn over each other in a lovey-dovey way with sparks and passion flying, while others might be called stodgy, content with sitting side-by-side in an easy companionship. In addition, love styles can change as a relationship matures over the years. Knowing your love style can help you evaluate your relationship, allowing you to have more realistic expectations about how love occurs and how it evolves over the years. What kind of lover are you? Health.com, with input from Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., a sociology professor at the University of Washington in Seattle, describes the six types of lovers:
Swept away by your lover’s good looks and physical attractiveness, you just love being in love. The problem? When his hairline recedes or her waistline expands, you are disappointed. Remember that romance doesn’t have to fade as the relationship ages.
You have very high standards–so high that you may put too much pressure on your partner to live up to them. It’s time to let go of that list or you could be living a very lonely life. Remember, what’s most important is companionship, love and forgiveness–not the size of a bank account, an Ivy League education, job title, the square footage of a house or anything else that impresses others.
You want to spend every minute with your partner. Even though you’ve been together for years, you still worry about the relationship. Watch out! Your insecurities are making you overbearing. You may need professional help putting your relationship into a realistic perspective.
You are so selfless and love your partner so much that you often give more than you receive. While that’s laudable, you need to make sure you look after your own needs, too. Do make sure you develop a life outside your marriage with your own friendships and interests.
It’s all about the chase for you. Long-term relationships bore you and when you’re in one too long, your eye may roam. If you’re married, make sure you avoid situations that could lead to an affair. Take temptation out of your life and instead find excitement inside your marriage.
First, you were friends. Then one day you realized, “I’m in love!” Your relationship may be quiet, but it’s strong. Just make sure things don’t get too platonic. Plan a romantic evening for two and rev up the sex and excitement.