Workplace romps may be the most universal sex dream, according to Wallace. But if you and your boss are getting it on in the Land of Nod, does that mean should cut back on those one-on-one meetings or skip next week’s happy hour? Probably not. “Sure, you may be sexually attracted to your boss,” says Wallace. “But if you’re having sex with him in a dream, your subconscious is probably becoming aware of your own ability to make decisions and act as a leader.” So once you shake that post-sex-dream awkwardness, perhaps you should schedule a date with your boss … to discuss your future with the company.
Not again! You’ve established a completely platonic relationship with a member of the opposite sex — and suddenly he’s got a leading role in your sex dream. What’s going on? You can chalk this up to your pal having a quality that you admire or see in yourself. Explains Wallace: “People often tell me, ‘I have a friend. He’s ugly; he kind of smells — but I keep dreaming about sex with him. Am I mad?” Quit the worrying. He probably has some talent (his karaoke skills?) that your subconscious is working to develop.
It seems like a no-brainer that the person you’re infatuated will star in your sex dream — but why you’re fantasizing about him in your sleep isn’t as obvious. “It’s easy to assume this means you want to have sex with that person,” says Wallace. “But you’re actually being drawn to one of his emotional or spiritual qualities.” (And you thought you had a dirty mind!)
After bosses, celebrities are the most common headliners in our sex dreams, says Wallace. And interestingly enough, the University of Montreal study found that women were twice as likely as men to have nighttime fantasies about sleeping with a famous person. What’s going on? Even though a romp in the hay with Jennifer Aniston or Denzel Washington may sound like a dream come true, your psyche is simply recognizing a talent you have in common with the star.
You thought you were finally over him, and suddenly he’s back in your dreams — naked. Why must our minds torture us so? According to Wallace, if you’re dreaming about an ex-lover, it could mean that you’re unknowingly repeating bad habits from your failed relationship. Consider this type of sex dream a red flag.
Your partner having an affair with someone else
if you’re honey “strayed” while you were snoozing, don’t be too quick to worry about what’s going on in real life. This sex nightmare probably has a lot more to with you than him. “When you dream that your partner is having an affair, it may mean that you’re losing faith in your own abilities or attractiveness,” says Wallace. Perhaps all you need is a confidence boost, and it’ll be you — not that forbidden mistress — starring in your sex dream.
“When people have sex dreams about strangers, the unknown person is often wearing a mask or has no face,” says Wallace. Who is this mysterious intruder? It’s just your subconscious telling you to unmask that talent you’ve been hiding. And according Holloway’s dream interpretation Web site, it may also mean that you’re discovering qualities you want in a partner — even though you haven’t found him yet.
Your family member
Eek! Having a sex dream with your sibling or parent sounds icky, creepy, and just plain wrong — but Wallace insists it’s completely normal. And once again, it all boils down to your kin’s character. If your dad, sister, or great uncle has some trait that you admire or recognize in yourself, watch out: You may just end up in bed with them … in your dreams, of course.
Bottom line? There’s no need to take that X-rated head trip too literally or start fretting about problems in your real-world sex life. Consider your sex dream the wakeup call you needed to get to know yourself better.