1. You cut hang time short to go home and play with your pet.
Your friend can watch The Bachelor alone cuz you never really liked that show anyway.
2. You have triple the number of pet selfies than biffle selfies on your camera roll.
Your friend will just have to deal with it.
3. You gladly help your pet stay warm in the winter.
Your friend can bundle themselves.
4. You prefer to run with your pet.
Your friend just needs to slow their roll.
5. You have more nicknames for your pet.
Your friend will forever only be “babe.”
6. You’re NEVER “too busy” for quality pet time.
Your friend can be needy, so sometimes you need a mini friendcation.
7. You cook exquisite dinners for your pet.
Your friend can fend for themselves.
8. Your pets are always welcome in your bed.
Your friend may sleep on the couch if they MUST stay the night.
9. You’ll happily pick up your pet’s poo any time of day.
Your friend can um, yeah… go it alone.
10. You two even look uncannily alike.
Your friend is actually jealous of this fact.
11. Your pet wouldn’t dream of talking your ear off about the stress of their boring job.
Your friend feels quite the opposite.
12. You spend more money on your pet for their birthday.
Your friend should just be appreciative that you made an appearance.
13. In fact, you love your pet more than your BFF because your pet IS your BFF!
You really only need a pet in this life.